Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Rockers and Rollers: a book review

If you're a fan of AC/DC and/or cars, then you'll love lead singer Brian Johnson's autobiography, Rockers and Rollers. Set up more like a collection of anectdotes than an actual memoir, Johnson relates stories from his life from the point of view of what automobile he owned or his friends/family owned at the time, stating that the two constants in his entire life were cars and music. Johnson writes exactly how he speaks (except it's actually intelligble LOL) so every line is a hysterical piece of northern English slang and euphemism, and he doesn't mince words. I've never laughed out loud more in my life while reading a book. From the first (and only) car his father ever purchased, to trying to talk bassist Cliff Williams out of impulse-buying an Aston Martin while on tour, to the start of his successful racing career, every chapter is the kind of story guys would share over pints. You feel like Johnson is your buddy the way he casually writes, like he's going to give you a clap on the shoulder and share a laugh with you at the end of each tale.
The cars mentioned are predominantly European, so if you're an American muscle car nut you might not be up for hearing about Aston Martins, Porsches, Renaults, Ferraris, Rolls-Royces and the like. But a passion for motors is a universal language, so any automobile aficionado regardless of what makes and models they prefer will be able to understand how Johnson feels. The stories involving his fellow bandmates, not just in AC/DC but in his earlier band Geordie, will give you insight on his relationship with fellow musicians and life on the road.
Even if you don't know anything about cars and don't care, the way Johnson tells the stories will have you howling. It's a quick read which you can breeze through in less than 3 days but you'll be thoroughly entertained, and it's a reminder that rock 'n roll and cars have always gone together like peanut butter and jelly.
I give it 4 out of 5 stars.

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Christmas Haul

It was a pretty good Christmas. My mom was beside herself that my dad broke down and got her her own Wii and my dad is very interested in learning how to sync music to his new iPod. His only concern is figuring out the most effective way to listen to it at work while keeping the bluetooth headset required for work in one ear. The cats got stoned on catnip and Frankenstein was totally enthralled with his first Christmas ever. I got lots of great stuff.

A new peacoat
A new bathrobe
New pillows with satin pillowcases
Slippers in the shape of Gir from Invader Zim - my favorite gift as I had a pair like 4 years ago but they got wrecked and had to be thrown out when I had a bedbug infestation
Peanuts Collection 1960s and 1970s Volume 1 on DVD
Watchmen on DVD
The Essential Weird Al on CD
Rockers and Rollers: An Automobile Autobiography by Brian Johnson of AC/DC
Pygmy by Chuck Palahniuk
$50 Kohl's gift card
Various candy and skincare/beauty products in my stocking
No pads for once LOL (inside joke from back when my grandmother was still alive)
$250 from my grandfather.

My other grandparents are paying off a medical bill as my gift and I haven't gotten the gift from my aunt yet but I can only assume it's yet another Nintendo sweatshirt from Hot Topic (seriously, I looove Nintendo but three's enough). I haven't gotten Wig's gift yet. I asked for Parker Lewis Can't Lose on DVD (only the BEST forgotten show of the 90s) but if he couldn't find it, a new ring or 2 to replace the 2 I lost at work this Season.

My grandfather, uncle, and my mom's cousins Raymond and his partner Tom and Julie and her husband and 2 daughters all came for dinner at our house. Olivia is 2 and Sophia's 3 months. Olivia's one of those toddlers that is too smart and clever for their own good. And y'know the old saying kids say the darnedest things. Raymond was telling a story of when he took her to some Santa's Village thingie and they're waiting in line and some other kid was acting up she goes "It OK Unky Raymond. I think he's retarded" Like where'd she learn that word? When we babysat her a few weeks ago she just turned to my mom and addressed her by her first name, like "Hey, Carolyn!" and my mom's like "Call me auntie!" Also it was quite funny to see how enthralled with my uncle Richard both Olivia and Sophia were. My uncle Richard's waaaaay out there. He's tapped. So they're just staring at him like "WTF?" He spent half the party watching Christmas Vacation and the other half watching Elmo because we put it on for Olivia but she wouldn't stand still...but he left it on, even after my mom's like "Y'know, Rich, you can change that..." no response "...unless you want to watch it..."

After the horde of people left I headed over to Wiggy's where Wig shit a brick when he got his special edition Nintendo DSi. We watched Santa Claus Conquers the Martian (Mystery Science Theater version of couse) which is our new Christmas tradition after it went over so well with him and Gahmstead last year.

...and WTF Luis Guzman is in Crocodile Dundee II? Sorry that threw me off. It's on TVLand right now and I look over and I see the one Hispanic actor who's in EVERTHING...besides Danny Trejo, but he's technically only in everything directed by Robert Rodriguez...and Bubble Boy.

Anyway, after the movie Wig gave me a different kind of Christmas gift if you know what I mean *wink-wink, nudge-nudge, say no more* We called it an early night soon after because even though it was Christmas it was still a Friday which means he HAS to go over Jack's with the rest of the gang to play 360. LOL.

Christmas Eve was fun too. In the morning after the overnight shift was over, a huge group of us went over to Denny's, including Ed our manager. I'm surprised we weren't kicked out for being loud, obnoxious and continuously talking about vaginas. Something about Christmas vaginas and everyone was replacing the word Christmas with Vagina in song titles...yeah, we're very mature. A couple of them were noticably drunk. How professional. Jason actually passed out in his aisle and John got a hysteriacal picture of him just curled up on a couple boxes. Not that Ed can do anything cuz John's also got a picture of him asleep on a shelf. See what I miss when I'm closed off in the RZone? Neither of them were as drunk as this one kid who was actually drinking AT work, having smuggled in old-school alocholic egg nog in a water bottle, but he didn't come to Denny's. Probably for the best. Good thing Season and the overnight shift are over tonight because he wouldn't have had a job still anyway.
Anyway, that was one breakfast/dinner/whatever that was chock full of innuendo. And male cleavage (Mikey makes some really convincing cleavage when he squishes his chest up, which is odd because he's a skinny guy and doesn't have man-boobs or anything). God we were there for like, 3 hours just stuffing our faces and laughing hysterically. And Ed paid for the whole thing as a Christmas gift to us - despite our protests. But we all threw in for the tip. It's bittersweet. I'm so glad Christmas is over and hours and general foot traffic in the store are going back to normal and I can get back on a normal sleep schedule, but I was finally starting to have a real rapport with some of the night crew (I don't see them much because we're in our own respective sections but after work we started getting to talking only in the past week and Dan's a funny-ass guy...and he's the only other person I know so far besides me and Wig that have see Dayjob Orchestra's video dubs on YouTube! I also got him addicted to iCarly LOL) There' always Facebook, which I HAVE to friend everyone on, especially to nab copies of John's pics of Jason and Ed sleeping and Mikey's hot tits LOL.
After stumbling home from Denny's I slept a little and headed over to Wig's. His friend and drummer Mikey was over and we all watched Dragonball Evolution and the Invader Zim Christmas episode. Then when Gahmstead came home we watched Dodgeball which I FINALLY got to see. Hysterical. Dragonball wasn't bad but it wasn't great. If you're a fan of the original manga and anime, it's worth renting because they get a handful of things right like character personalities and the balance of action and comedy, but took a lot of liberties with the backstory. I don't think they even used the term Saiyan once. If you're not a Dragonball fan, this movie doesn't hold up much as just an action flick. There's some cool martial arts stuff and a fiery lava Mount Doom-esque landscape where the final showdown happens and there's an evil alien (played by Spike from Buffy and Angel) trying to take over but it's too cheesy even for people who like cheesy.

All in all it was a good end to a mediocre year.

Monday, December 21, 2009

OK, I haven't watched Little People, Big World in a little over a year. Why is the TVPG rating in huge white letters filling the entire screen for about a minute and a half at the beginning of the episode now? It's annoying. This isn't the kind of series where the content is a big issue with potential viewers and you really need discretion. And what's TLC's obsession with people with dwarfism now? First it was Little People, Big World, then the Little Couple and now The Little Chocolatiers about a dwarf couple who run a chocolate shop. I love little people (mainly because they make me feel tall and there's few people who can do that when you're 5'1") but they're just normal people with normal jobs and normal day-to-day business. They just happen to be 3 or 4 feet tall. I will give the Roloffs credit for giving other people with dwarfism inspiration that they can do anything and everything they desire and their size won't make it impossible. But I think some of the other dwarves in these newer series are just jumping on the bandwagon. Another thing that I wonder is why so many dwarves prefer the term "little people." I think that's more condescending than dwarf or midget. Well maybe not midget, midget can be pretty derogatory. But I don't see anything wrong with dwarf. I mean the condition is called dwarfism so it's more of a technical term if anything. Maybe it's because it's also a term for a fantasy species and they don't want to be compared to faeries and orcs. But I think little people calls more attention to their height. Calling them little is, well, belittling...Plus it compares them to the famous toys from Fisher Price. They're not individuals, they're choking hazards. If I had dwarfism, I wouldn't mind being called a midget, but that's my preference. Obviously everyone has their preferences. I mean, I'm the kind of person who doesn't mind being called a guinea. It takes a lot to offend me. I mean, they're just words. Words only have power if you let them. Some words, some epithets, have a darker and sinister origin than others but in this day and age they are just words and they only hurt if you let them hurt you.

Sory about that. There's a Little People, Big World marathon on right now and it reminded me of those things that have been on my mind before. Anyways...

Yesterday I got to go to a Christmas party at Wig's uncle Kevin's house. They've invited me to many different family get-togethers and parties in the past but it's always on a Sunday and I always work Sundays and I'd always hear about it last minute so I couldn't request it off. But this time around I'm working overnights so I got to make it this time around. Kevin lives literally 2 blocks away too so it wasn't out of the way which was good because of the snowstorm. This was finally the first time I met more of Wig's family besides his grandparents, although I went to school with his cousin Joey from kindergarten to eighth grade so I knew him and I had met Kevin and his wife because of their volunteering at the school when Joey was a kid. Wig's aunt goes "I remember you, I had to send you to the principal's office in 2nd grade when I was a lunch mother." Everyone remembers the negative LOL. Wig has 5 uncles and 1 aunt on his father's side, then of course their spouses and then cousins. So I was one lone guinea in a sea full of Fitzpatricks LOL. Wig's youngest cousin Aidan, his uncle Brian's son, looks a lot like Wig did when he was that age. But everyone in that family looks like everyone else. They got some deep-running genes. But now I have a pretty good idea of what my son's going to look like. They did a Yankee Swap and I ended up with a Snuggie LMAO. If you're not familiar w/a Yankee Swap, basically everyone pitches in a surprise gift, then you pick a number and everyone picks a gift in numerical order. You can keep what you end up with or trade with someone before you. The first person gets to pick from everything at the end since there wasn't anyone before them to pick from the first time. Wig ended up with a 2-pack of stainless steel water bottles, and I've been wanting one so I made him give me one LOL. Well, I said I'd never pay for a Snuggie, but if someone were to give me one I'd use it. It is useful for knitting or crocheting or playing DS, and it's warm. A lot of people say to just wear a bathrobe backwards, but the Snuggie's got the length of a blanket with the sleeves of a robe. A bathrobe only goes to like, your shins or ankles, you can cover up your feet with a Snuggie. But they do look retarded. But it came with the book light! Now when I want to read in bed I won't go blind and die of radiation using my ultra-violet super bright desk lamp!

Now I'm trying to unravel a huge knot in a skein of yarn (y'know, I keep buying Red Heart and I NEVER learn) so I can finish the scarf for Wig's sister. I have 4 days! Thank God Christmas is almost here. I'm working overnights the next 3 nights and then I have Christmas Eve and (obviously) Day off. I'm working overnights Saturday for recovery but I don't know about next week yet. Basically, my manager Rob told me last Tuesday to only do overnights for the next 2 weeks because it'll be better for everyone. This Season hasn't been too kind for me stress-wise. I don't know what set me off but I kept having panic attacks. I should be used to this, this is my 8th Season, and although it was noticably worse this year compared to the past, I should've still been able to make it through. But basically for my sake so I wasn't going through weird sleep schedules and having panic attacks or getting sick and for the store's sake so no one had to put up with me stressing out and yelling anymore I haven't worked during opening hours since last Tuesday. I just wish he would've thought of that sooner. Because after Friday, it won't matter! Sure it'll still be busy with returns and kids coming in with their gift cards and Christmas money, but it won't be as busy as it has been. Ed said they might have one or 2 more weeks of overnights. It'll be nice to have the differential for another 2 weeks but it won't be necessary for restock and all that.

On the one hand I'm glad the new year is starting soon because it's an opportunity to start new things and hopefully things will go better this year. But on the other hand, it's another year gone. Time's moving too fast, and I feel I have less and less time to acheive my goals. But I'm going to remain positive and work harder in 2010 and pray that this year I'll actually get married!

Friday, December 4, 2009

Popping in

Just popping in so the blogosphere doesn't think I'm dead. Lately I've been busy with work or being in pain because of work. If it's not my back it's one of my knees. Or my feet. Or my arm. I've been constantly getting headaches too and while they're not severe I hope it's not a sign that I could end up getting cluster headaches like my dad. Plus I've started getting panic attacks at work, something which none of my coworkers have any sympathy for. It took them 15-20 minutes to get someone to cover for me so I could go to the break room to calm down. And yesterday my manager Steve told me I should just quit. The only people seemingly on my side and willing to help me out at work are my other managers Ed and Aaron, who actually produce helpful solutions. Ed has recruited not one but three people to work RZone overnights with me and on nights I'm not there so more stuff is getting done. And the other day Aaron actually ran over to Shaws to buy my Advil when my backache was unbearable. Aaron also almost looks like Rick Astley so whenever he's working I have Never Gonna Give You Up stuck in my head the whole time. This time of year's always horrible and there's always some things that get worse and some that get better. I try to remind myself that there's only 3 weeks left, but those are going to be three loooong weeks.

When I'm not working or in a stupor trying to recover from work, I'm working on 3 crochet projects - 2 scarves, one for Wig's sister and one for his mom, and a blanket for our friends Katie and Fetus' baby. They found out they're having a boy and are naming him Seamus Joseph Conley. Fetus is fiercely proud of his Irish heritage. I have a feeling the middle name Joseph is for our friend Joe Tilton who died last September. Fetus was really close to him. All three are made up of granny squares so I'm seeing granny squares in my sleep right now. Other than that most of my Christmas shopping is done. I have a few more people I need to get gifts for and I don't know what to get them yet. My dad finally broke down and got a Wii for my mom so me and Heather are going to get Wii Fit Plus so now she doesn't have to complain that I won't move the system into the living room. Me and Heather are getting dad an iPod Nano and I got Wig a Nintendo DSi bundle that we had on Black Friday because it was too good to pass up and his DS is broken. Heather asked for Aquasaurs, these prehistoric fish you hatch in an aquarium.

Speaking of which Heather's actually STILL working despite threatening to quit when the manager failed to have the schedule out on time and then told her last minute she had to work when she already had plans. Instead the manager apologized and said it was all his fault. She's actually going to stick out through the whole Season and however long into January ToyZAM is open for. She might even transfer to Spencer's once it closes (they're owned by the same company) but that's a might. She jokes that she's going to work for three months every 19 years.

So after seeing many Etsy CreateCrochet Teammates and a few of my close friends make fan pages for their Etsys (Etsies?) I jumped on the bandwagon and made one too. I'm planning on some fun Fan-only promotions in the future. I've spent a lot of time in the past couple weeks networking and connecting with everyone on the CreatCrochet team- following any blogs or Twitters they have, favoriting their shops, and becoming fans on FaceBook. The more connections, the more word spreads. The CreateCrochet team is a great community. We recently did a swap where we were matched up and got to know our partner through convos and we had to make a secret gift for each other. I was matched with a woman from Vermont and it was fun getting to know her. I felt bad because she had a mild stroke and it's crazy because she's only in her late 20s. But she's doing OK now. She made me a reuseable Swiffer pad and a scrubbie and I made her a set of regular-sized and mini brain slugs (Mommy and Baby to represent her and her 2-year old daughter) in the same variegrated pink I made Flav's out of. I'm aiming to join a couple more teams, one for my jewelry and hopefully find some local ones. If you're on Etsy and not on a team yet look it up. It's a great way to network, get your items some more views, get tips and support and have fun doing your craft.

Tonight I'm getting together with a group of former Toys R Us Medford coworkers. It's something we do 2 or 3 times a year to catch up, have some drinks and have fun. We'll be going to Border Cafe in Burlington. Jill usually orchestrates the plans and other regulars always include Lynnette, Noelle, Joanne Ellard, Amy Struppa, and Melissa Cashman. Last time we got together Aimee Walkup was back in the area after moving the North Carolina and getting married. It was funny because a lot of us were wondering whatever happend to her after she quit and boom there she was. LOL. But I look forward to getting buzzed on margaritas before pulling an overnight LOL.

I wonder when we're putting up our tree. Probably this weekend or next weekend. My dad has a reputation as a Scrooge or a Grinch because he hates Christmas decorations. He just doesn't like the hassle of digging them out, putting them up, and then having to clean them up after the holidays. I'll admit the tree is a bit of a pain in the ass, hauling it upstairs, putting it together. (I'm allergic to pine so we can't have a real tree. Real trees are a hassle too though. Cutting it down or going to the lot and picking one out, hauling it back home, trimming it, watering it, sweeping up shed needles) And of course our cat Wyatt always has to try to climb it, and we have no idea what the new one, Frankenstein, is going to do when he first sees the tree. But I can't wrap any gifts until the tree is up because I have nowhere else to put them. If I try to shove them back in the back of my closet while they're wrapped, the wrapping could get ripped. So, no wrapping until I can put them under a tree.

Beating up a zombie to Queen's Don't Stop Me Now is one of the greatest moments in cinema history. Why don't I own Shaun of the Dead on DVD? Watching it edited on Comedy Central is subpar.