Tuesday, June 29, 2010

So I finally told my parents today. They were more disappointed and concerned about financial stability than anything else. They said themselves they can't be mad, we're adults and at least I'm 25 and not 18 like she was. But they're worried about Wig and I holding down jobs and paying bills while raising a child. The news about my supervisor position eased a little bit of the concern, but it won't be enough. They feel bad that they can't support us the way my grandparents supported them when they were pregnant with me. But they'll be emotionally supportive and do what they can. My grandparents will throw some money my way. I'm not expecting the ride on their coattails. But they took it somewhat well, as well as one can when their eldest daughter who's not yet married, in dire finanical straits w/tons of student loan debt and still living at home tells you she's pregnant. They're secretly excited to be grandparents, I think, but the timing is bad and my situation could be better. At least it's not worse and it is slowly improving.
After telling them, I immediately posted it on FaceBook. I was dying to announce it to the world but couldn't because my mom would see. Perhaps I did it too soon because my aunt was the first to see and her reaction was "EXCUSE ME?!" my mom was like "Why'd you have to go announcing it on FaceBook already?! The phone's ringing off the hook!" Then later she pokes back in and says "Your father's calling all his friends" so he must be somewhat excited. But the outpouring of comments were 99% positive, all congratulations except for my aunt's incredulty and my "uncle" Chris was like "congrats? I'm going to be a great uncle!" A couple of me and Wig's mutual friends IMed me on FaceBook. Greg, who's in Afghanistan right now, was very supportive, Katie aka K-Fon was like "WTF?" and suggested abortion before I mentioned that our financial situation was improving, so she offered both her congratulations and condolences and let us decide which to take.
Wig told his brother and Guru and he said that Guru told him it was the worst time to have a baby and said "my condolences" which surprised me because as a father, I thought Guru would give Wig the old "It's a lot of hard work and scary but worth it" speech. My theory is Guru knows how Wig feels and said what Wig needed to hear. Guru's wife Lindsey was very excited for me on FaceBook. But of course, women and men handle pregnancy very differently. Wig said Gahmstead said more or less the same as Guru. While Gahm isn't one to be all mooshy about stuff like this, I was hoping he'd be a little more supportive while still voicing concern about finanical issues and how it would affect the band and everything else. Again, he's probably just saying what Wig wants to hear. I know that while Gahm is not one to immediately come off as a baby person, he was rather excited and involved w/Seamus' birth and seemed to revel in the fact that he was his godfather, so he's got a soft side. While he may think having a baby this soon is a bad idea for us, he'll probably be supportive and play his role as uncle. Wig hasn't told any of his other friends yet or his parents. I know the reactions are going to be mixed. But his friends and family are going to be the few people actively against this pregnancy. So far none of my friends have had a negative reaction and my parents, while concerned and disappointed, are not forcing me to abort it or put it up for adoption and are standing by my decision to keep it. We have more support than dissent, and that's a positive sign that things will work out for us. It's still going to be hard but I know we can work it out. People with less than us have made it, I keep reminding myself that. We have more than we thought we would've.

Training for my new supervisor position should start next week. I also have ConnectiCon next weekend. Then the Stoneham store is opening I think the 3rd week of July. It's going to be exciting.

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